The White Menace

As the Syrian refugee debate rages across the internets and the airwaves, and suggestions are made about what to do about it, generally ranging from not accepting refugees to putting anyone suspicious (e.g. Muslim) in camps, which has no negative historical consequences – trust me, I’m a history buff, and I’ve never heard of anything bad happening in a camp [citation needed].  However, in this era of pants crapping terror and knee jerk ethnophobia, I wanted to draw people’s attention to a far greater threat to our beloved nation.  Now, I just want to make it clear that I’m not encouraging racism or hatred, I just love ‘Murica too much to see it defiled and destroyed by a threat from within.  I’m talking about white people, of course.  And their religion and culture.  Also, anyone who disagrees with me is automatically a racist and unAmerican.

A History of Violence

White people first arrived in our country in the 1500’s, supposedly to escape religious persecution, forced servitude and factional brutality in their home countries, mostly in Europe, a continent known for its lack of hygiene (see Black Death), constant tribal warfare (see European history, all of it), and religious fanaticism (see Hundred Years War, Inquisition, Reformation, Catholic Church history, the Bible, etc.)  After failing miserably to grow food, the indigenous peoples assisted by teaching them how to grow food and presumably how to chew their food, and wipe their own asses.  They repaid this hospitality by murdering them and spreading their diseases across the continent.

These filthy, disease-ridden, rat-bitten, homeless refugees expanded west until they reached the ocean on the other side, stealing land from other Europeans, from the natives, and even from each other.  They forced anyone who didn’t believe in their God to convert or die.  They created a human trafficking ring:  Kidnapping tens of thousands to use for labor and sex, which according to their own religious text, a book they call “the Bible,” is perfectly right and moral.  “Slaves, obey your earthly masters with deep respect and fear.  Serve them sincerely as you would serve Christ.” -Ephesians 6:5 and “When a man strikes his male or female slave with a rod so hard that the slave dies under his hand, he shall be punished.  If, however, the slave survives for a day or two, he is not to be punished, since the slave is his own property.” -Exodus 21:20-21.

After 350 years of slavery, they finally ended the practice, though it would be another 100 years before those freed slaves would have the right to live and work among their former masters.

They also proved to be natural thieves and criminals.  First they stole the land and all its resources, mining said lands so much that whole  forests and mountains disappeared, and they’ve sucked rivers and lakes dry – thirsty, big-lipped bastards. They stole democracy and architecture from the Greeks.  They stole mathematics from the Arabs.  They stole their language from the English.  They stole religion from the Jews.  They stole their holidays from the Pagans.  They stole people.

They Stole Our Jerbs!

So, with the Caucasian’s genetic predilection for thievery, it should come as no surprise that they’ve come here to take our jobs!  Did you know that the vast majority of high paying jobs in this country as well as nearly all the millionaires and billionaires are white males?  They didn’t just take our jobs.  They took the BEST jobs!  99.56% of all U.S. Presidents have been white males and 100% of all vice-presidents.  They’re taking the jobs that we all want.  Lazy, paper pushing, money grubbing, ass-kissers who refuse to do any hard labor and agricultural field work.

Creeping Bible Law

Even as they move into our neighborhoods and take our jobs, they also want to impose their oppressive, sexist and violent religious rites and practices on us by instituting Bible Law in our communities.  Did you know that according to the Bible anyone who doesn’t convert must be smoted… smited… smitten… killed?  Well, it totally does.  There’s way too many passages to mention, so here’s a list.  So unless we worship exactly as they do, they are required to kill us.  And we’re letting these people into our country?  Around our children?  I don’t know about you, but that doesn’t sound like the kind of people we want in America.

Our legal structure has already been heavily influenced by their religion, including the illegalization of prostitution and old laws against homosexuality, abortion, adultery, divorce, premarital sex, etc. that were repealed.

They also want to indoctrinate your children in schools.  Prayer in school (and you know they ain’t teaching meditation or having those kids bow toward Mecca), abstinence only sex ed (despite incontrovertible proof that it doesn’t work), creationism (despite the fact that specific references to the world being created by Allah, Satan or the Flying Spaghetti Monster have all been roundly rejected by school boards and local politicians), and more.

They even ritualistically mutilate babies.  Originally popularized by Christian fitness guru and cult leader John Harvey Kellogg – whose brother learned that if you leave bread dough out long enough Corn Flakes happens – when he advocated circumcision as a means to prevent masturbation in boys because of the Bible’s stance against it and the significantly less popular procedure (these days at least) of administering carbolic acid to the clitoris for girls.  I don’t know about you, but I don’t want the kind of people who ritualistic chop up genitals living with us.

Most Nazis Were White All Whites Are Nazis

If we take the tried and true method of determining guilt for a thing by what color the skin of the perpetrator was and then interpolating that data to assume that everyone of that same pigment are guilty of the same crime, we must assume that all white people are Nazis.

The Unibomber?  White.  Timothy McVeigh?  White.  Jeffrey Dahmer?  100% cracker.  Ted Bundy?  Total honky.  Actually, just about all the serial killers.  Waco, Jonestown, Heaven’s Gate, the KKK, the Westboro Baptists, the Confederacy, etc.?  Chalkies one and all.

And all those guns!  Whites are twice as likely to own a gun than blacks or Hispanics, though 55% of all gun homicide victims are black (only 13% of population) while whites were 65% of the population and only 25% of gun homicide victims.  These pasty, vicious thugs are wandering our streets, armed and trigger happy, in their SUVs and pickup trucks listening to their savage music from white “artists” like Ted Nugent and Merle Haggard that preach hate and misogyny.  They say they need all these guns for self-defense, but can we really trust them with such an arsenal on our own soil when they’ve proven themselves such a threat to everyone else?

They’re Jerks

Now they want to deny the Syrian refugees entrance into America.  I’m not saying that white people are secretly supporting ISIS and helping them hunt down and murder their opposition, but it looks awfully suspicious.  I’m not sure there’s any room in a free and safe America for white people.  I know I don’t feel safe with them around.  I think we’d all sleep a lot easier knowing these cruel savages, potential ISIS agents and dirty traitors are all safely locked away in camps, not just for our protection, but their own.

However, I have another option.  Since these people would clearly prefer to live in the Middle East where they can live in a racially segregated, fanatically nationalistic and theocratic nation, I say that we start an exchange program.  For every American that forgets what this country was about, we can trade them for a refugee.  If you’re willing to condemn a person to live and die with ISIS, then maybe you should walk a mile in their shoes, not that you’ll be allowed to have a luxury like shoes.

Some of you may be saying “FH, aren’t you white?”  Well… shit…

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About fanaticalhypocrite

I'm your average agnostic Irish Catholic Welsh Jew born in rural West Virginia as the mildly autistic son of a motorcycle riding nurse and an unemployed, ex-military, atheist theology major (likes there's any other kind.) Just another tragically disconnected member of the bitter American proletariat living in the twilight of U.S. world dominance. I'm a medical transcriptionist by day ("They're going to fire me tomorrow" has been my motto for 11 years), a security guard/campground host/lost & found department/problem solver/bouncer/bookkeeper understudy 24/7/365, and a nerdy wannabe writer by night. And also day. My life is basically a non-linear blender full of random activities. And now I run a blog because... why not? It's not like I was using my precious time to cure disease or end world hunger. Might as well tell a bunch of strangers about why [insert anything here] really pisses me off.
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